Now that my son is officially a toddler, he’s talking more. And saying full sentences. This has been especially helpful during meal time. Now instead of just throwing food on his plate and hoping he’ll eat it, he can ask for what he wants to eat. Of course he usually asks for waffles, yogurt, grapes, milk, and oranges. All of them. In that specific order. (I can’t judge the kid’s taste in food, as all of his requests sound good to me.)
We all know that kids learning how to talk also opens the door up to them repeating everything they hear the adults in their lifes say. For some reason, the kids always hone in the things they shouldn’t say and they repeat those things like crazy.
During dinner on Saturday night my kid was too busy talking to eat his dinner (read: waffles). During of of my least proud Mommy-Moments I told him to “just zip it, and eat”. Shortly after that my husband spilled some food on his shirt and said, “damn it” under his breath.
Needless to say Babboo spent the rest of the night telling us both to “zip it, damn it!”
Hey, we probably deserved it.
Everyday when I pick Babboo up from daycare I ask him how his day went while I’m packing up his gear. His typical response is to say “went”. He likes to repeat the last word he heard me say.
“What did you do?”
“Do.”
“Did you play outside?”
“Outside.”
“Did you play in the sandbox?”
“Sandbox.”
Last week Babboo had a new response when I asked about his day at daycare. He pointed to his forearm and said, “bite. Ouch.” I pulled up his shirt sleeve and found a very distinct toddle sized bite mark.
This bite mark was the first of it’s kind on my precious child’s skin. I was horrified.
I immediately asked his teacher about it.
“Who the hell bit my kid today?”
His lead teacher told me that yes, he had been bitten by a “friend” (that is the word they use at his daycare about other students) and that ice and pressure were applied to Babboo’s skin. She then told me the child in question had been reprimanded. She also told me that it was daycare policy to not rat out the offending “friend”.
This is probably a good policy as the Mommy-Bear in me might have hunted down The Biter and bit him right back. Only harder.
On our way home from school Babboo touched his arm, again, and told me about his “owie”. And then he said “Jamie bite Babboo”.
HAA! The daycare’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy had been foiled by my newly speaking toddler.
Take that!
Okay, so knowing that Jamie is the “friend” that bit my sweet baby boy doesn’t really change anything. I’m not going to ask that Jamie be kicked out of the daycare for doing what all kids do at some point. I’m not going to ask that Jamie and Babboo be kept apart from each other. I’m not even going to let the teachers know that I know.
But now I know that Babboo will let me know if something bad happens to him when I’m not around. He knows I’m on his side.
Here’s hoping that as Babboo gets older, he’ll continue to tell me when something happens to him. And here’s hoping Jamie keeps his sharp fangs away from my precious baby boy.
So tell me, do your kids tell you when something happened to them while you weren’t around? And what do you do with this information?
Isabel is a pseudonym for this Seattle-based blogger. She’s been working since the day she realized soda and lip gloss weren’t free. Isabel became a mom in 2006 and continues to work full time, outside the home, since diapers and mortgages aren’t free either. You can read far too much about her personal life at hola,isabel.
If you have questions, anecdotes, or topics for “Double duty. One paycheck.”, send them to Isabel at holaisabel [at] gmail.com.
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18 responses so far ↓
1 Amanda - VintageDutchGirl // May 14, 2008 at 12:53 pm
We are still in the non-talking category. Can’t WAIT to be able to ask him a question that he can ACTUALLY RESPOND TO!
2 Rhi // May 14, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Babboo and I have so much in common. I often eat waffles for dinner, too.
Biting got my friend’s little girl (we call her the Bruiser) kicked out of day care here! I am surprised that little guy didn’t get expelled!
3 Susan // May 14, 2008 at 3:55 pm
I LOVE breakfast for dinner (aka Brinner)! Babboo has good taste - literally.
4 Marsha // May 14, 2008 at 4:05 pm
I can’t believe daycare did not atleast tell you something happened. We get a notice something happened, but no, they don’t tell us who. DD of course does later!! DD talks a lot, but also tells stories. So, sometimes if daycare did not tell me, she does and makes it sounds to out there and story like. So, I must check with daycare to see if it really happened! She will even tell me what happens to the other kids!
5 Daring One // May 15, 2008 at 12:05 am
What a relief that he’s gotten to that point. This is a huge worry of mine with my kids when they’re teeny.
6 Stephanie // May 15, 2008 at 8:08 am
That is so awesome that he told you. (And funny too).
Oh, I had a biter. It is the most frustrating thing as a parent. Mine never did awful damage– he only left teeth marks once, but it’s tough. At the biting age, the kids just don’t “get” the discipline. And it really is something they just grow out of.
But I always felt kind of ostracized by the other moms. Like I was a bad mom, or I couldn’t come to play dates and such.
And just know, that the biter will eventually get bitten back– even if it’s a couple years later. My boy’s had some serious bruising bite marks– I didn’t like it, but I also didn’t give the mom a hard time either. (Sometimes just a look, can make the mom of a biter feel judged.)
I’m just saying- take it easy on the biter.
7 In which I become an ungrateful little shiz | hola, isabel // May 15, 2008 at 9:42 am
[...] Babboo got bit at school. But don’t worry, he totally ratted The Biter out. Read all about it over at SeattleMomBlogs. [...]
8 AmyBow // May 15, 2008 at 10:09 am
My daughter also tells us when she gets bitten. Although day care sends home a note as well.
And while she does tell us who bit her, we can’t really place any confidence in her claims. She will name every kid in the class and then add “Daddy” to the mix.:)
9 Jilt // May 15, 2008 at 11:02 am
P was a biter. Usually when another “friend” tried to take a toy he was playing with. It’s our daycare’s policy to let the parents of the biter and bitee know what happened (without giving names, of course). It always mortified me when I’d get a report that he bit someone.
We were even called to the director’s office once because of it. It was so hard to discipline since we didn’t see the biting behavior at home or outside of school. It was a phase - thank goodness it passed, but to all moms who have kids who’ve been bitten, I’m sorry. Since I can’t apologize to the kids P bit, I’ll apologize to you.
10 Carrie // May 15, 2008 at 11:18 am
I can’t believe how much my (almost) 14-month-old can say already. I’m afraid of him getting bit at daycare, which I’m sure will happen sooner or later, but I’m also afraid of HIM being the one that does the biting. Our daycare has a “3-bite” policy. If he bites 3 times he gets kicked out.
11 Liza // May 15, 2008 at 11:35 am
Well, you know that after the broken arm, when Noah told us he was scared of his teacher — he named names — we yanked him out of there as soon as we could find an alternative.
Re: biting. In Noah’s baby day care room, it was a big problem, especially for the biggest (read: getting bored) kids. We bought a board book called, “Teeth Are Not for Biting.” Noah still “reads” it to us and likes telling us that biting hurts and biting is naughty.
12 Jezer // May 15, 2008 at 12:14 pm
Yes. And Al also rats himSELF out!
13 DeAnn // May 15, 2008 at 1:40 pm
Oh my word, this is awesome. I love that he’s all big and tattling!
14 Mel // May 15, 2008 at 2:17 pm
I have never commented before but the timeliness of this blog had me laughing. My child has also bit another little girl at daycare (his only time so far…phew) and that little girl came right up to me when I went to pick him up from daycare to tell me “C bit me and he got in time-out” So there was no hiding for my little guy
But last night I went to pick him up from daycare and a little girl, being held by her mother, says “C hit me.” C came right over to me and said “No mommy, M did it” What a little liar…and at 19 months too. I was told that he really didn’t hit her he just touched her…phew again.
15 Professor Art Nerd // May 16, 2008 at 5:05 am
My nephew is a bit older than Babboo, and just wait till the next stage- Liam embellishes (so much nicer than “lies”, no?) his stories. It always starts out with the truth-
\What happened to your arm, buddy?
Brian smacked me.
Oh yeah, what happened then?
Nancy put him in time out. She smacked his butt! He cried and cried.
Most of it is bull, but he loves telling that story!
16 CPA Mom // May 16, 2008 at 11:52 am
I have to agree with Stephanie above(http://mommiverse.blogsome.com/) because I had a biter. Don’t hate the biter (just a little joke). The other moms treated us the same way. He was actually expelled from two schools when he was 2. Seriously!
I love it when Eeyore tells me who hurt her - it’s like we’re pulling one over on the daycare who won’t release names!
17 Lin // May 17, 2008 at 7:27 am
Your preschool should have told you - it’s really not OK to let this go as it can be really upsetting to a child, and - here’s the biggie - can lead to the bitten child trying out the behavior.
I understand the policy of not telling you who was the biter - the isolation and over reaction can be an issue, and biting really is a normal developmental stage for a lot of kids. But it also can be a continuing problem and the school needs to be able to reassure you that they do address it appropriately, without necessarily naming the child.
That said, when my child was being bitten (repeatedly!) and the school said they often didn’t see it, we did two things - we taught our kid to yell “No Bob, No Bite!”, and we kept pushing at the school, questioning what they were doing, the ratios of kids to teachers. To their credit they quickly put a “shadow” teacher int he classroom - assigned to watch the biter and intervene at first, and then for a while assigned to watch my kid, as that seemed a better way to catch the behavior. All worked out, my kid felt empowered, and then happy cuz of the extra attention, and the biter eventually learned and moved on. (Wait till the potty words go bad.)
18 HollowSquirrel // May 19, 2008 at 5:54 am
Awesome, Babboo.
My favorite response though is his “went” for how his day was. That sounds like something my son would say.
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